Weirdest of AliExpress – August 2022

What? These are real? Here we are, at the pinnacle of human innovation and technical prowess. We’ve engineered and designed great things, terrible things, but great. AliExpress is a great place to order many things! Headphones? Got’em! Auto parts? Got’em! Frying pan phone case? Uh… of course, got’em! It’s hard to find things you can’t order on AliExpress, some with questionable legality and quality. These are some of the weirdest and most ridiculous things you can get if that’s what you are into.

Transparency is cool! No affiliate links here! Chrispy Crunch gets nothing if you buy this stuff or not

Frying pan phone…case?

Check it out if you want: AliExpress

  • lol wut?
  • Yeah, so it’s a frying pan with a phone case attached
  • Camera hole for additional convenience I guess
  • Made of plastic
  • Do not use it as a frying pan, with or without a phone in it
  • “Fit’s right in my pocket!”, said no one ever
  • I like that it includes tether holes to a wrist strap or similar – how useful

Squidermelon keychain

Check it out if you want: AliExpress

  • Equal parts unsettling and neat
  • Squid pro ro
  • These are pretty cute, in a weird way
  • Oh, it’s a keychain!

Ramen Blanket & Pillows

Check it out if you want: AliExpress

  • Slip into the salty goodness of ramen
  • No water boiling required compared to traditional ramen
  • Washable…unlike normal instant ramen
  • Great way to avoid carbs
  • Could increase appetite for ramen

Overlord meditation device

Check it out if you want: AliExpress

  • Ả̴̟L̶͙̓I̷̻̩͒E̴̞̽͛N̶̮͝
  • Meditate with our overlords
  • Alien abduction is not required
  • Don’t be intimidated by its steller yoga pose
  • May whisper secrets of the universe while you are trying to sleep
  • Note the 15cm (5.9″) height

Kitty cat/beer tactical vest

Check it out if you want: AliExpress

  • Aww, look at the cat in a tactical vest – cute
  • Or if cats aren’t your thing, use it on your beer bottle
  • Beer bottles love tactical vests
  • I’m sure the pictured beer company totally approved of this product

Tiny 3D dinosaur landscape keychain

Check it out if you want: AliExpress

  • “Multi-application”…keychain
  • Use it on all things that support keychains
  • Really fun for at least 15 seconds
  • Great for impressing Tinder dates

Baguette pillow for humans and cats

Check it out if you want: AliExpress

  • All the bread looks, none of the carbs
  • Cat’s will love the bread
  • Hands can’t stop themselves from squishing into bread
  • Loaf around with your loaf of bread

A meditating cat!?!

Check it out if you want: AliExpress

  • Cat comes complete with cat nips
  • Sure to make all of your guests go “…oh? Interesting”
  • Meditation inanimate feline companion
  • Literally never stops meditating, good role model

Fish bones!

Check it out if you want: AliExpress

  • Send us your bones!
  • At least you know where all the bones are, your move fish
  • Do not eat the bones
  • These bones are only made for demonstration, and must be destroyed

Zombie popsicle molds

Check it out if you want: AliExpress

  • They’re going to give you brain freeze, Barbra
  • Not challenging to take out of the mold at all! Totally not
  • Bones in the center of your popsicle, just as nature intended
  • “I’ll order the popsicle please, bone-in

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